HUMOUR IN UNIFORM

Sometime a mere slip of word or two may put you in a very embarrassing situation. I learnt it hard way, when I was posted in a remote place Missamari(Assam). As part of routine annual exercise, our Higher HQ had to move out on field exercise for a short duration. The area of operation while in exercise was in the general proximity of our Unit, and therefore the onus to look after the administration of Officers in the HQ came down on us for the duration of their stay there.

One fine morning I was called by my Commanding Officer who tasked me to look for a suitable place for establishing Officers Mess for the visiting Officers of our HQ
I knew about one Nursing Officers Mess building which was in state of disuse for a long time, but was appropriate to accommodate all officers with perfect infrastructure for running a Mess . Only few touches in terms of repairs and painting was required to make it fully functional.

My CO liked my suggestion and we took up a case for taking over the building for the duration of exercise. The same was approved by the appropriate authority and I was asked by my CO to write a letter to Chief Matron in the Military Hospital for handing over the building for our use. So I proceeded and wrote a request to Chief Matron in the Hospital. It read something like this;
Madam,
With reference to our letter No — dated–, it is requested that your Nursing Officers Mess be handed over to the undersigned at the earliest. The same will be used by the Officers of HQ ____ for the duration of ____days.

Next day I visited Chief Matron for taking over the building. She stared at me with an unusual face. She silently pulled the drawer and took out the familiar letter and asked me if I had signed the letter. ”Of course madam, I have signed it, is there something wrong?”was my innocent query. ” You better read it right now here”, she insisted. Puzzled, I obliged and read the letter to her. it read like this ;
Madam,
With reference to our letter No — dated—, it is requested that your Nursing Officers be handed over to the undersigned. same will be used by the officers of HQ — for the duration of ___ days.
To my horror I realized what a blunder I had committed. My clerk had omitted the word “MESS” from the complete name of “Nursing Officers Mess”, thereby changing its complete meaning. And I just signed it without noticing this error. What followed next is an experience better forgotten. It was a herculean task to pacify her.

It soon became talk of town and no prizes for guessing the comments I received from my colleagues and seniors laughing loud with obvious wink..
FRIENDS!!!! Read carefully before putting your sign..